Secrets of a Stay at home mom....

So, they came out. Everything that shouldn't have. Stuff that was supposed to stay deep down inside me. Okay, maybe the wrong way to word that, but, we opened up this can of worms....
He keeps asking me why I did it. He says that he has to know why I did it. That he needs to understand that way he can try and prevent it from happening again. I kept telling him that I didn't know. I don't know. I don't know what to say. It all happened so fast. He kept pushing and pushing and I finally ripped out my diary.......
And I started:
10/26/2004
"Jorge has been gone, yet here, h e's home tonight, but, I hardly feel as if I'm married........blah blah...I would never cheat.........I value our relationship and children too much......"
11/02/2004
"Jorge has been in Charleston for 2 days going on 2 nights. I feel so sad and lonely w/o him......I do believe he loves me.....I love him so much and I wish he would understand how serious I am."
11/07/04
"Jorge is always lost in space when he's home. I feel he's uncomfortable. He doesn't want to walk near me when we're in public.....He always puts work before family.......I need a husband to love me and be there for me...."
11/08/04
"Jorge is still gone...I love him so much...I miss him so much.....I just want him to come home...."
12/03/04
"I don't know how I've put up with my life this long...I feel like I'm so alone....I want to leave and go somewhere....I feel like Jorge uses his work in Columbia as an excuse...."
01/23/05
"Extremely frustrated....hopeless!!"
03/13/05
"He already knows I'm having doubts about our marriage. He gets upset anytime I bring it up.He's living in a fantasy world, where he thinks everything is perfect...."
07/21/05
"2 days after our wedding anniversary and I feel as if I'm again, fighting for my marriage...."
10/25/05
"Baby, I'm sorry I made you cry...."


Maybe that was a mistake, huh?